Miley Cyrus went on Instagram Live with Demi Lovato today for the second day of her Bright Minded series this week. The two Disney stars spoke about how they’re spending their time social distancing (Lovato is with her family, while Cyrus is avoiding contact with her mom and grandmother because although she feels fine, she had been around some people who weren’t feeling well), and they touched on their friendship and self-care right now as people’s daily routines are altered.
Cyrus opened up about her own past struggles with body image to Lovato in one of the chat’s most revealing exchanges. The two discussed how online culture can be both entertaining and hurtful. For Cyrus, seeing memes comparing her to a turkey after her 2013 VMAs performance altered the way she saw herself for years, she said:
I basically went through two or three years where I wouldn’t wear shorts. I stopped wearing skirts on stage, all this shit because after the VMAs, and I had on my cute little nude bodysuit, everyone started comparing me to a turkey and putting a turkey in my outfit. I was just so skinny and so pasty and they kept putting me next to this turkey, and I was feeling so bad on myself that I did not wear a bikini for like two years and no one thought that would ever make me feel some type of way.
Like we were talking about, memes can be so much fun but they can also just be so hurtful. Because memes can be funny but when it’s about you, it is just so not funny. And people made like these gifs and that was just such a wakeup call to me on wanting to use my platform for a bigger purpose. That’s when I started Happy Hippie [Foundation] because I just needed something bigger than this industry because it just made me feel so bad about myself. And it was like, I was probably 21. I was just kind of starting to like understand myself as an independent person and it was just really, really hurtful just to be like so body shamed like that. And it really affected me in my personal life of just changing the way I would be or like not wearing shorts to the beach. It just changed my personal life. And what was so hard about it was my brand has always been about being so unapologetically myself and being confident and the worst thing I would feel I would be to my fans is like a lying or a fraud.
But I felt like having this persona of being the most confident girl on the planet was actually kind of fraud because I was so insecure on the inside that in my personal life, I wasn’t even wearing bathing suits or shorts. And when I was wearing like my little leotards and things, I had on fucking four pairs of tights because I was so insecure.
Lovato could relate, telling Cyrus, “Oh my god, same!”
“First of all, I’m so sad that you went through that and I had no idea,” Lovato told Cyrus. “Like, I would’ve—I wish I could’ve been there for you but I didn’t know. I feel like we’ve gone through times where we’re closer and [more] distant, and that’s fine, that’s what friends do. I just wish I could’ve been there for you, but like if that ever fucking happens again, you better call me. I’ll walk to Malibu, I swear.”
The two touched on their 10-plus year friendship and how this pandemic could offer people time to reconnect with friends. “We can not talk forever and then some bullshit will go down, and I’ll just know you’re the person I want to reach out to,” Cyrus told Lovato. “I just think you’re such a light.”
Lovato returned the sentiment, telling Cyrus, “I feel like you’ve always been such a light and that’s why we connected at 14. Like, I had a fucking gap in my tooth. We connected then because we just saw something in each other. Maybe it was because of spirituality or maybe it was just our hearts, I don’t know.”
“Or maybe we were just gay as fuck,” Cyrus quipped, and Lovato burst out laughing.
At the end of their Live, Lovato offered some wise words to her fans about body image now. Lovato has spoken out before about her struggle with body dysmorphia and eating disorders.
She said, “I think it’s so important for anybody that has dealt with body image or anything like that, that right now when we’re home with our mirrors and things like that, it’s so important not to get consumed in negative self talk and this goes for anybody, whether you’ve dealt with body image or not, we’re confined into these spaces. We’re going to see the same mirrors everyday. We’re going to have some of these same negative thoughts. It’s important not to beat ourselves up over getting nervous, over maybe not you know, eating perfectly, not working out perfectly. These are different, very scary times. And we’ve never been through anything like this in our lives so this is all new to everyone and it’s ok. Be gentle with yourself. And just take care of yourself as much as possible.”
You can watch Cyrus and Lovato’s full discussion on Cyrus’s Instagram.